Have you ever caused yourself any genuine, physical harm while playing a video game? My thumb tore open after playing Gran Turismo endurance races for a week back in 1998, and I once kicked a table doing some kung fu shit for an EyeToy game. That’s about it. I have never, unlike this poor guy, done anything requiring serious medical intervention.
We’re about to meet Danny. Danny is in the Navy, currently stationed on Okinawa, and in his downtime Danny likes to play video games and sometimes stream them on the internet. That’s all very normal and expected, but we’re meeting Danny today not for what he normally does, but for the freak accident that took place recently while he was playing some Call of Duty.
As you’re about to see, Danny is getting near the end of a CoD match in this clip and gets a little excited. He gets to his feet, jumps up and down a bit, arches his back and then just...eats shit. Collapses, like one of those donkey toys where you press the button and their limbs fall down.
Two things here. Firstly, I’m sorry Danny, but as a long-time enjoyer of the “dudes getting hurt real bad” genre of physical comedy, this is—within video game circles, at least—an all-timer. It’s like a modern recreation of Will Ferrell’s “I’m Very Badly Hurt” bit from Austin Powers, only with a Call of Duty twist:
Thirty seconds in, I am concerned. Sixty seconds in, I am laughing. By “I gotta stop the stream, I’m so sorry,” I’m done.
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Secondly, and more importantly, as with any good “dudes getting hurt” videos, I can only laugh because Danny is OK!
Get well soon dude.